My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
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