Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
