kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
