We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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