Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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