u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
