we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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