there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Randomize
