Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
