I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
