Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
