How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
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