But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
