I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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