She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
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