This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
