Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Rumble strips road head = magical
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
