idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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