so explain again why im purple
no
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
