that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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