wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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