we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
