he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
