I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
