what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize