Someone shit on the floor
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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