i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
you made out with another girl for some wings
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Randomize
