In the future we'll all be gay
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Randomize
