And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
