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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
