theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
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