We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
