Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Randomize
