The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
