it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
