i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
