i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Randomize
