Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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