I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
