and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
My life is pants optional.
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