Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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