She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
