I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I need a beard to bite.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
