Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Randomize
