I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
