He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
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