Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
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