your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
