I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
