I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
